In my coach mentoring practice, one of the most common areas coaches want to deepen is how they establish and maintain agreements. It sounds simple on paper, yet in real conversations it can get slippery. A clear agreement creates safety, direction and partnership. It sets the container so the coaching can actually work.
What I often say to the coaches I mentor is that agreements are less about rules and more about shared clarity. When you slow down, check in, and co create the path ahead, you show presence, partnership and respect. It also demonstrates a level of professionalism that clients notice and appreciate.
Below are some practical questions, statements and small activities you can use with your clients that map neatly to the ICF behaviours within Core Competency 3. Establishes and Maintains Agreements.
Feel free to use or adapt what resonates.
1. Describing your coaching philosophy
3.01. Describes one’s coaching philosophy and clearly defines what coaching is and is not for potential clients and stakeholders
Try something like:
Statement:
Here is how I see coaching. It is a reflective thinking space where you set the direction and I support your thinking. I do not give advice and I do not solve things for you. My role is to help you access the best in yourself.
Activity: Ask the client to share what they think coaching is, then compare understandings together.
2. What is and is not appropriate in the relationship
3.02. Reaches agreement about what is and is not appropriate in the relationship, what is and is not being offered, and the responsibilities of the client and relevant stakeholders, including commitment to working toward coaching goals
Questions:
What do you need from me as your coach so this relationship works well for you?
Is there anything you want to make clear about how we will work together?
Here is what I need from you for this to work for me.
Statement:
Let us agree on our responsibilities so we are both clear on what we are committing to.
3. Clarifying parameters and logistics
3.03. Reaches agreement about the guidelines and specific parameters of the coaching relationship such as logistics, fees, scheduling, duration, termination, confidentiality and inclusion of others
Questions:
What practical details do we need to lock in so this runs smoothly?
What will help you feel comfortable with things like timing, confidentiality and communication between sessions?
Simple activity:
Invite the client to summarise the key logistics in their own words at the end of the conversation.
4. Developing an overall coaching plan and goals
3.04. Partners with the client and relevant stakeholders to establish an overall coaching plan and goals
Questions:
If we imagine your ideal outcome from our work together, what would be happening?
What would make this coaching engagement worthwhile for you?
What might other relevant people want us to achieve together?
Statement:
Let us sketch the big picture first so we know what we are aiming toward.
5. Exploring client coach compatibility
3.05. Partners with the client to determine client-coach compatibility
Questions:
What do you need from a coach so you can do your best thinking?
How will you know if I am the right coach for you?
Activity:
Invite the client to test the coaching fit with one short coaching question before committing.
6. Establishing the session focus
3.06. Partners with the client to identify or reconfirm what they want to accomplish in the session?
Questions:
What feels most useful for us to work on today?
If this session were truly valuable, what would be different by the end?
What’s on your mind? Thanks MBS and The Coaching Habit.
7. Identifying what needs to be resolved or addressed
3.07. Partners with the client to define what the client believes they need to address or resolve to achieve what they want to accomplish in the session
Questions:
What would you like us to dig into so you can reach that outcome today?
What is sitting under the surface that might need some attention?
Where have you seen this pattern before?
8. Defining success measures for the coaching engagement or session
3.08. Partners with the client to define or reconfirm measures of success for what the client wants to accomplish in the coaching engagement or individual session
Questions:
How will you know you have moved forward today?
What will show us that the overall coaching engagement has been successful?
What do you want at the end of the session that you don’t have now?
Statement:
Let us get clear on what success looks like from your perspective.
9. Managing time and focus during the session
3.09. Partners with the client to manage the time and focus of the session
Question:
We have X minutes left, what do we need to focus on or achieve in that time?
Statement:
Let us check the time and make sure we are still heading where you want to go.
10. Staying aligned to the client’s outcome
3.10. Continues coaching in the direction of the client’s desired outcome unless the client indicates otherwise
Question:
You originally wanted to talk about X, I can’t see the connection between what we are discussing and that. Are we on the right path?
Statement:
I want to check that this direction is still useful for you. Tell me if we need to adjust.
11. Closing the coaching relationship respectfully
3.11. Partners with the client to close the coaching relationship in a way that respects the client and the coaching experience
Questions:
As we come to the end of our work together, what do you want to acknowledge in yourself?
What will help you feel complete as we close this coaching relationship?
12. Revisiting agreements when needed
3.12. Revisits the coaching agreement when necessary to ensure the coaching approach is meeting the client’s needs
Questions:
How are we?
How is the coaching?
Looking back at our contract is there anything that needs to change?
If you use even a few of these prompts in your coaching, you will strengthen the partnership and deepen trust. And if you want support to polish your agreements, unpack recorded sessions, or build your confidence across the competencies, I would love to explore mentoring with you book in a time to chat below.